Dear Judah, my firstborn son,
I cannot believe that you are two. TWO! It was exactly two years ago today that I woke up to Papa saying, "Cheryl (the midwife) called and wants us to go up to the hospital." We didn't know for sure, but we knew it was a very strong possibility, that we would be meeting you that day. We packed up our bag and headed up to Paradise. When we got there they told us to go for a long walk and eat lunch, then to come back so they could check me.
I couldn't really "walk," per se, but I could definitely waddle. So, we waddled all along a bike trail. I had to stop to pee and Papa kept watch, making sure noone was coming. Then, we went to a little cafe and had lunch. Do you remember going back there after brother was born? After lunch we went back to the hospital where they had us walk and walk and walk some more. The hospital kind of grossed me out. It was weird to see all the sick, dying people when our brand new, healthy baby would be greeting us shortly. The walking still did nothing, so Cheryl decided she would break my water. Grandma Donna and Aunt Miranda had a feeling you would be coming that day, so they were at the hospital. After they broke my water they left because Aunt Reni was really freaking me out. They broke it at 10 o'clock and you were born underwater at 11:14pm on October 20, 2004. It was a cool evening and had sprinkled earlier that day. But, it was perfect inside that hospital room. It was the night my entire world changed.
Baby boy, as much as I hate to admit and am still ashamed of it, I was SOOO freaked out when I first found out I was pregnant. After taking 3 pregnancies tests, I knew you were definitely on the way. I was scared, but I'd always wanted a baby, so I couldn't help being incredibly excited at the same time.
You are my joy, little man! I love everything about you. You are the most outgoing, confident, secure person I have ever met in my life- young or old. You are not embarrassed to approach someone and are always saying, "hi." Some people say you're "bossy," which is completely, 100% wrong. No sweetie, you are a LEADER! You will be successful in anything and everything you do. Like I tell you all the time, you are PERFECT. Completely perfect. There is not one thing I would change about you. I love your little hands and your chunky little thighs, your laugh and giggle, the way you are too interested with your surroundings to pose for a picture. I love the way you give me hugs and smooches, the way you say, "Yaya, mama" (I love you, mama). I love reading to you and playing with you, taking you for walks in the park, showing you off to everyone I know.
And now, you are a big brother! I know you love Sammy so much, and sometimes you show it in your own special way. You don't understand that it's ok to ride Papa, but it's not ok to ride brother (which does result in timeouts). You always have to say goodnight to him and give him kisses. I can't wait for you two to become bestfriends. I'm sure you'll have your share of squabbles, but your wives will be thankful that you already know how to deal with conflict. You are a great big brother and someone worthy of Samuel's adoration and imitation.
I could go on and on forever about how much I love you, but I'll leave it at that. I love you. I love you completely with all of me. My words could never express how much I love you. You won't ever understand my love until you have kids of your own. But know this, Hudi, your Mama's love for you will never change. I will always be here for you, to hold you and love you and tell you how perfect you are. Happy number two, big boy!
PS Today we had so much fun at the pumpkin patch, celebrating your birthday! Tomorrow is your party- yay!